open door therapy

RELATIONSHIP ASSESSMENT

The A.R.E. Questionnaire

Developed by the late Dr. Sue Johnson, creator of Emotionally Focused Therapy, this questionnaire measures the three pillars of a secure bond: Accessibility, Responsiveness, and Engagement.

These aren't just nice-to-haves. They are the necessities for feeling safe, seen, and loved. When both partners show up as accessible, responsive, and engaged, you create a haven where intimacy can thrive. When one is missing, distance grows When one is missing, distance grows.

How to Use This Assessment: To truly understand the deeper elements of your relationship,, both partners should complete this questionnaire from two perspectives:

Your view of your partner: How accessible and responsive are they to you?
Your view of yourself: How accessible and responsive are you to them?

Once completed, score and compare your answers. Where do you align? Where do you miss each other? These gaps are often where the conversation needs to start.

DOWNLOAD THE questionnairE

How Can We Help?

The Keys to Connection Reside in Being

Accessible, Responsive & Engaged

assess your relationship now

_______________________________________

FROM YOUR POINT OF VIEW, IS YOUR PARTNER ACCESSIBLE TO YOU?

I can easily get my partner's attention.

My partner is easy to connect with emotionally.

My partner shows me that I come first with him/her.

I do not feel lonely or shut out in this relationship.

I can share my deepest feelings with my partner and he/she will listen.

FROM YOUR POINT OF VIEW, IS YOUR PARTNER RESPONSIVE TO YOU?

If I need connection and comfort,

my partner is there for me.

My partner responds to signals that I need

him/her to come close.

I can lean on my partner when I am anxious or unsure.

Even when we fight or disagree, I know that I am important to my partner and we will find a way to come together.

If I need reassurance about how important I am to partner, I can get it.

ARE YOU POSITIVELY EMOTIONALLY ENGAGED WITH EACH OTHER?

I feel very comfortable being close to,

trusting my partner.

I can confide in my partner about almost anything.

I feel confident, even when we are apart, that we are connected to each other.

I know my partner cares about my joys, hurts, and fears.

I feel safe enough to take emotional risks with my partner.

- SCORING -

If you scored fewer than seven, don't panic. This isn't a failure; it's a indicator.

It means your Intimacy Bond needs attention and care —and giving it that attention is where healing begins

DOWNLOAD THE QUESTIONAIRRE